Trips are my treasure
In the last year, I’ve rarely taken a trip out of the city…
And recently, it highlighted itself.
Most of my besties are in relationships now, and me? Still single – chosen btw. The thing I love observing about their relationships, are the joint escapades to different places. One friend recently went to Edinburgh with her partner, and it got me to thinking how I yearned for a moment to share that moment with a partner. Though, I don’t actually want union right now, I’m not after a partner. I have a direction and I’m moving with it.
Anyway, the moment shortly passed and I then went on to thinking about how much solo moving I have done, and how much I love it. And how I haven’t done it for a really long time. All the holidays I’ve been on since getting back to the UK have been with others, I’ve hardly ventured on my own. I absolutely thrive off taking my backpack, getting off and exploring what lies ahead.. This part of me that ignites so much has been dormant for some time.
challenging moments I’d navigated before and how empowered I felt by navigating them. Meeting new people, smelling new smells, exploring new places.
On this day I made a commitment to myself to use my time off well. To book time off and feed this part of myself.
Step 1? Get outta here.
I took the train to Bangor and stayed in a holiday lodge on Anglesey.
One laxed day at the beach, eating chicken with my bare hands, caressed by the rays and the wind, feet in the salty moist sand.
It was so tranquil, very sunny, I took time to just rest, read, eat, take it really slow and hammer my uni assignment. This trip out wasn’t necessarily to explore, but they don’t always need to be, do they.
Sometimes it’s just about taking some space, time away from the noise.
I got exactly that.
A few days out to decompress.
In this space I realised two things.
I needed time out more than I realised. Time out must come up on the priority list.
When I lived in Congleton, I’d have a crazy 4-5 days in Manchester, then come home to the quiet. My home was that boundary. Now I live in the city, even when I practice slower living where I can, I don’t have time fully out. It’s really important for me to centre.
I’m starting to realise that you can feel something without acting. Feelings don’t require immediate action. Sometimes, all it needs is a little curiosity. Feeling tired and worn out didn’t mean I needed to run away from my life (in previous years I may have grimaced and pondered on whether to book a flight and get outta here). It reminded me that I need to prioritise moments of space – outside of my space. Feeling a brief longing for partnership didn’t mean I needed to find someone. The surface level is always the ringtone for a deeper message. It reminded me of the experiences I value and parts of myself I’d unknowingly neglected. Both feelings became teachers, rather than ‘problems’ to solve.
I started there and ended up here, remembering my independence, dormant parts of myself that needed nurturing. She’s back at the surface, ready to dive in, alongside my crazy but beautiful life. Best of both worlds huh?
